Life is a sexually transmitted disease, and the mortality rate is one hundred...– R.D. Laing
Shut up and pass me the goddamn turkey. Love, Me
Crazy Animals That Have Thwarted Bill Murray.
Gopher… Groundhog… Jaguar Shark… And Renee Zellweger
Whenever I see on the news that the police call off the search for a missing...– Conor McKeon, 105%
SWEET LINCOLN'S MULLET!: Things I Learned from...
Diversity is an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era. A woman’s brain is a third of the size of a man’s. Dogs aren’t afraid to eat an entire wheel of cheese. San Diego is German for “a whale’s vagina”. A flautist can suck scotch into a flute, then hold it near a butane lighter - which will then emit a small, but still very impressive...
Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I’m a dog...– Heath Ledger in “The Dark Knight”
Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have...– Mark Twain